


Tell me where your love lies

by meirkuna



Category: iKON (Korea Band)
Genre: Angst, Cheating, Explicit Sexual Content, Fluff, Implied Relationships, Implied Sexual Content, Kissing, M/M, One-Sided Relationship, Smut, Unhealthy Relationships, just a little though cause it's supposed to be angstyyyyyy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-16
Updated: 2019-03-16
Packaged: 2019-11-16 13:40:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,762
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18095387
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/meirkuna/pseuds/meirkuna
Summary: Is it wrong that Donghyuk just wants Bobby to love him?





	Tell me where your love lies

**Author's Note:**

> here I am minding my business thinking oh hey, lemme read some bobdong. then I remembered—I’ve read everything in the tag. So here I am making a bobdong ff.
> 
> The ending took a long time and I was just gonna cut off half of it and leave it be an open(heavy angst saddd :( saddd) ending but I feel like I did good so please enjoy :)

~tmwyll~

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

His touch burns Donghyuk's skin, his lips whisper things that touch his heart and make him want to _believe_. He himself is intoxicating, and no matter how much Donghyuk tries to stay away, he always comes back, right to _him_.

 

 _“I’d never leave you,”_  his words burn into Donghyuk and he twists his fingers into the bedsheets underneath him.

 

” _..would never hurt you either.”_  A particularly sharp thrust has Donghyuk screaming in pleasure, back arching and hands clenching at the pillow underneath his head. "So pretty," he whispers against his wrist, kissing the prominent vein and letting his arm fall the bed soundlessly. Donghyuk is such a mess underneath him. His tan skin is glistening in sweat, covered in hickeys. His stomach is covered in cum from the previous times Bobby had pushed him over the edge. He still wasn't done.

 

"So, _so_ pretty," Bobby traces the bite marks on the inside of Donghyuk's thighs, another hand firmly holding his delicate waist. Donghyuk whimpers in response, the pleasure slowly building in the pit of his stomach. Bobby grabs both of Donghyuk's hands and puts them above his head. Bobby's thrusts are sharper and deeper, finally giving what Donghyuk has been craving, yet not all the way there.

 

"B-Bobby, fuck, pl-please" he moans, writhing underneath him. Bobby snaps his hips up suddenly, hitting Donghyuk's g-spot. Bobby angles his hips do hit that spot repeatedly, and Donghyuk can feel his climax approaching. "Yes! Yes! _**Yes**_!" He chants. Bobby kisses him messily, sloppily. "So _good_ ," he whimpers.

 

"Look at you," Bobby whispers, biting Donghyuk's lip. "Whimpering, needy." With another thrust, Donghyuk is coming on their chests with a loud cry, tears forming in his eyes. Bobby continues to thrust into him, no matter how much he struggles because of the sensitivity. "Shh, it's okay—fuck your tight. Almost there," A few stray tears leave wet trails on Donghyuk's cheeks and Bobby wipes them away. It emits a warm fuzzy feeling inside Donghyuk and he smiles faintly.

 

" _Don't_ _listen_ _to_ _what_ _other_ _people_ _say_ _about_ _me_ , _okay_?" Donghyuk squeezes his eyes shut, turning his head to the side. Bobby grabs Donghyuk's cheeks gently, forcing him to look at him.

 

_“I love you so fucking much,”_

 

Donghyuk wishes he could believe that.

 

☁︎☁︎☁︎☁︎☁︎☁︎

 

"I'm telling you D.K, you're gonna get hurt and that's the truth," Donghyuk rolls his eyes because how many times has he heard the same thing over and over and over again? A lot. To the point where Donghyuk doesn't even bother to pay attention. Yunhyeong snaps his fingers in front of his face.

 

"I'm not zoned out or anything, chill. I heard you," Donghyuk pushes Yunhyeong's hand away. "It's the same damn thing over and over again, Yun. I'm through."

 

Yunhyeong sighs, running a pale hand through his hair. "I'm watching out for you, both Jinhwan and I." Jinhwan snorts. He tried a long time ago to get it through Donghyuk's thick skull that Bobby was no good, and after a while, he had given up. "If you get hurt, that's on you," he had said.

 

"Whatever, c'mon, enough talking about Bobby and his side bitches." Donghyuk was used to it by now. He was used to Jinhwan and Yunhyeong grilling him about his good for nothing "boyfriend"(because they aren't really together but Bobby swears he's all about him.)He was used to talking about his feelings about the whole situation—and by situation, he means Bobby—he was used to waking up in an empty bed, he was used to Bobby assuring him that he was his and only his. That he's loyal. He's used to it all and almost nothing shocks him anymore. Nothing.

 

"You don't deserve it," Yunhyeong sighs, taking a sip of the wine in his glass.

 

"No one does but hey, better me than any one of you."

 

"No, not better."

 

But what can Donghyuk do?

 

☁︎☁︎☁︎☁︎☁︎☁︎

 

"You look good in my clothes," Bobby whispers, running his cold hands up and down Donghyuk's back. Bobby's hands rest on his waist, and he kisses Donghyuk's neck. The position is quite awkward, as his cheek is pressed against the wall and his hands are restrained above his head. Donghyuk attempts to move away, but he only ends up pressing his ass against Bobby's growing bulge. He does end up turning, and when Bobby moves to kiss him he pushes him away. Earlier on, Donghyuk had found Bobby flirting with some girl. Holding her, kissing her, whispering god knows what in her ear.

 

Donghyuk hadn't come with the mindset that he was going to see Bobby, yet he did. (It's a party, obviously, Bobby would be there.) He drowned himself in alcohol and to take his mind off of Bobby, he danced with Junhoe. Junhoe offered to help make Bobby jealous, as he doesn't know him and the plan would be perfect, but at some point, Donghyuk didn't care to make Bobby jealous anymore. He danced his heart out with Junhoe and pretended he couldn't feel someone staring at him.

 

It only lasted for a bit until Bobby whisked him away and well, here he was, trying to kiss him. "Move," Donghyuk says, pushing Bobby away. "I saw you kissing that chick, you aren't about to come and kiss me right after."

 

"Hey, hey, hey. Wait," He grabs Donghyuks wrist, pulling him towards his chest. "It's not like I--"

 

"Not like you meant it? Like you wanted to kiss her? Bobby, I know you. I _know_ you. You can't lie to me," Donghyuk attempts to leave again, wishing that the tears clouding his eyes would just disappear. He's learned to be good at hiding his emotions when it comes to Bobby. He's good at pretending he doesn't care and that it doesn't bother him. But you can only lie to yourself and others for so long. Bobby grabs Donghyuk's hand again, pulling him close.

 

"I'm sorry. You know she doesn't mean anything." Bobby sucks ass at trying to console people--Donghyuk especially. How is that supposed to make him feel any better?

 

"Then why kiss her? Why the fuck do you flirt so much if they don't mean shit? Why do you go around having sex with every human being imaginable? Why do you always tell me you love me and that you mean it, but you go around doing all that? Bobby what the hell is wrong with you?!" Donghyuk wants to say more, he wants to cuss Bobby the fuck out, he wants to let him know exactly how he feels, but he's choking up on his tears and it feels like he can't speak.

 

"What are you even talk--"

 

"You know damn well Bobby! God, you make me sick. You act like I'm blind to your actions and words. I know exactly what the fuck you're doing when you go out. I know that you come home after touching somebody and then you touch me. You tell me how good I am, how pretty I am, how much you love me, that you're different than everyone else. That you fucking love me. How can--Do you say all those things to everyone else too?" Bobby's still quiet, biting the inside of his cheek. Donghyuk takes a breather, wiping the tears from his eyes and sighing deeply. He runs a hand through his hair before turning to Bobby to look at him. "I don't understand, why you just can't be with me."

 

"The thing is I'm not your boyfriend! Fuck, I don't even know what we are. I can go out, and have fun, and do all the shit I want to, and I can also come back home to you." Bobby exclaims, throwing his hands in the air for emphasis. Donghyuk pretends that what Bobby says doesn't hurt him, wills the tears to stay right where they are. His vision gets blurry and he tries his best to blink them away.

 

"You right, you’re not my boyfriend. We aren't even together. I'm just a body for you to use. You come home when you don't feel like fucking someone else. You tell me you love me when you want me to boost your ego. You just love knowing that somebody is waiting for you patiently like a dog. Fuck you, Bobby. Don't even bother coming home tonight. Or ever, I suppose." Donghyuk leaves the room Bobby had brought him to, slamming the door shut behind him. He runs down the stairs and through the party goers to the front door. Outside he calls Jinhwan and waits for him to pick up. He would've called Yunhyeong, but he wasn't ready to hear "I told you so, " yet.

 

JInhwan pulls up next to the curb where Donghyuk is sitting. He gets out of the car, running to the other side. "Hyukie? Oh my god, are you okay?" Donghyuk rushes to Jinhwan, practically jumping onto the shorter male. "What the--"

 

"J-Jin-hwan" Donghyuk's voice is shaky, his lips trembling, holding back the onslaught of tears. "I-I" Eventually he breaks, sobbing into the crook of Jinhwan's neck.

 

"Shh, it's okay," Jinhwan whispers softly, holding his friend tightly. He came expecting the worst, but this was way worse than he had thought. Donghyuk looks so...broken. He continues to cry, hiccuping and sobbing into Jinhwan's sweater. "Let's go home?" He suggests after a while. Donghyuk has calmed down a bit, he's not wailing anymore. "C'mon, get in the car" Donghyuk does as he's told, but questions why Jinhwan isn't. "I need water," He lies, smirking the whole time. He bounces into the house, and Donghyuk laughs. 15 minutes later Donghyuk has stopped crying, his eyes red and puffy. He has no more tears left to burn.

 

"You feel better?" He asks Jinhwan who's absolutely beaming.

 

"I'm not what's important right now,"

 

"What did you do?" Donghyuk groans, putting on his seat belt.

 

"Slapped him, yelled at him, threw a drink at him, slapped him again. All in that order,"

 

 

"Fucking crazy," Donghyuk sighs, smiling the best he can at his best friend.

 

"Only for you," Jinhwan replies sweetly, ruffling his hair.

 

Donghyuk lays in Jinhwan's bed, staring out into the deep black. He doesn't know how to feel. They weren't together, so it wasn't a break-up, but it sure as hell felt like one. "What to do what to do," He whispers to himself, moving from his side to his back. He was beyond tired--after having told Yunhyeong and Jinhwan everything, they made him tea, watched a movie with him, comforted him, and then told him to get some rest. But it's hard sleeping when your heart is literally breaking, and all you can think about is the person who made it like that.

 

 **Bobby**.

 

Bobby.

 

 _Bobby_.

 

Donghyuk falls asleep after crying for 2 hours straight.

 

☁︎☁︎☁︎☁︎☁︎☁︎

 

 

Donghyuk gives in too easily. Literally only a month later, he gave in to Bobby's constant texting and calling. He suggested they meet up. That night only ended in more pain for Donghyuk. He let himself loose, unable to control his emotions. Bobby was right there, right in front of him. Real. He thought, one night. One more night. Just _one_ _perfect_ night, and then they'd go back to their lives--without each other. It was intoxicating, the way Bobby kissed him, held him, whispered dirty things in his ear. It was unreal the way he fucked him, hard, had him begging for more, moaning like a bitch in heat. All of it was unreal, and so maybe that's why Donghyuk had thought it should stay a perfect memory.

 

Except one night turned into two, and two turned into 4 and so on and so forth, and Donghyuk was warped into everything that was Bobby. Constant heartbreak included. This time he kept it a secret from his friends because he was scared of their reactions. He was finally getting out of that sad stupor, and now here he was, slowly going back to the way things were.

 

"Bobby? When are we gonna stop?" He had asked one night when they were laying in bed. His head was on Bobby's chest, and he was tracing circles on his hand.

 

"Stop what?" Bobby asks, hand resting on Donghyuk's thigh.

 

"Doing this. Messing around and stuff. You already know how I feel," Donghyuk closes his eyes, breathing heavily out his nose. "I'm just confused. I don't know why I keep letting you string me along," Bobby groans.

 

"This again?"

 

"Yes, this again. I'm not gonna be by your side forever. I'm not gonna be waiting here patiently for you. I don't want to anymore."

 

"Then don't," Bobby says. Donghyuk turns around and listens to the sounds Bobby makes as he gets ready to leave. He doesn't stay anymore like he used to. The minutes he gets his nut he's gone, and Donghyuk wonders if Bobby's just using him again, or there' someone else he goes home too at night. The door closes with a soft click, and Donghyuk buries his face into the blankets in hopes to stop the tears from coming out. 

 

Bobby comes back.

 

He always does. It's something that Donghyuk figured out a long time ago but doesn't understand why. The knocking on the door is loud and frantic, and when Donghyuk opens the door Bobby immediately pulls him in for a kiss. It's rushed, sloppy and messy like always. "Need you," Bobby whispers in between kisses, hand undoing Donghyuk's jeans. "Now," He says almost breathlessly, eyes cloudy with lust. Donghyuk allows Bobby to whisk him away to his bedroom and yesterday's events continue.

 

Bobby's grip on his waist is tight and bruising, and he's being way more rough than usual. Donghyuk doesn't mind. The pain doesn't allow him to think. "Harder," He moans, nails digging into Bobby's back. He hums a yes, and lifts Donghyuk's leg up and over his shoulder. The angle allows him to go deeper, and the thrusts against his g-spot don't cease. It's only time before Donghyuk comes undone. He's a mess(like always), begging and moaning, asking for more and more and more. Bobby laughs, teasing him. The more he says "faster, faster, faster," the slower Bobby goes. His thrusts are still sharp, impaling, and Donghyuk almost screams. It brings tears to his eyes, the teasing. Bobby's delicate hands ghosting over delicious pink buds, his lips leaving bruising hickeys on his necks and collarbones, his hands burning him everywhere they touch. Donghyuk comes with a broken scream, and Bobby follows in pursuit. 

 

For the first time in a while, since Bobby stopped living with him, Donghyuk experienced the joys of aftercare. He was so close to drifting off, but Bobby insisted. "Join me?" Donghyuk asks, and Bobby joins him and they take a bath together. It's oddly intimate, and Donghyuk chooses to stay quiet the whole time, scared he'd ruin it if he opened his mouth.. 'Something on your mind?" Bobby asks, humming as he plays with the bubble bath soap.

 

"No, no. It's nothing," Donghyuk should stop talking. He's going to ruin everything if he announces the plaguing question that's been on his mind for the longest.

 

"You sure?" Bobby asks, onyx eyes boring into his own. Donghyuk looks down into the soapy water, debating with himself if he should really ask.

 

"Why are you doing this?" Donghyuk questions, leaning his head back against Bobby's chest and closing his eyes. 

 

Bobby shrugs, "I felt like it. I know that's not what's on your mind though," Donghyuk suddenly feels warm, hot and itchy all over. It's like the thought itself is burning him inside out. It's a question that needs to be asked, but Donghyuk doesn't want to know the answer. It'll just hurt him even more.

 

"Don't leave if I ask?" Donghyuk winces when Bobby circles his arms around his waist. He's afraid he's going to get up and leave, that this almost happy feeling will be broken like glass hitting the floor and shattering.

 

"Just say it."

 

"W-when you leave, who do you go to? I know you don't go straight home." Donghyuk's voice turns to a whisper by the time he's done speaking. Bobby hums, and he can feel the vibrations on his neck.

 

"Do you really want to know?" Bobby asks, hand moving to make Donghyuk look at him. He blinks in response. "Kim Hanbin. Every time I leave, I go to his house. Always have been." Donghyuk wishes he never asked, and that Bobby atleast had the decency to say "no one,". Bobby talks about Hanbin a lot, and he always assumed that they were just best friends. He didn't know they were more than that. 

 

"Are you gonna leave?" Donghyuk asks once he's in bed.

 

"Do you want me to?" Donghyuk looks at Bobby, and he sighs, crawling into bed beside him.

 

"Massage my ass while you're at it, it hurts." Bobby laughs.

 

"Next time I'll be more gentle."

 

☁︎☁︎☁︎☁︎☁︎☁︎

 

 

He and Bobby had another fight again. It was probably worse than all the other ones, and Donghyuk cried for 2 weeks straight. Bobby hadn't once picked up his messages or calls, and Donghyuk could only imagine that he was with Hanbin. The images crowded his mind, and at one point Donghyuk couldn't contain his feelings. Jinhwan was pouting over some guy not paying attention to him, and he snapped. He told them everything expecting to get yelled at. But Jinhwan and Yunhyeong didn't do anything. They listened and reprimanded him a little about his choices, and let him know what options are out there. The thing is Donghyuk wants Bobby. He will always want Bobby. He knows he's being used, yet, he can't do anything about it. He's blinded by the love he has for Bobby, and the hope that Bobby will finally turn around and stop messing with his heart. A few weeks later Bobby asks if they can meet. Donghyuk thinks, "One last time", and it'll be over. He wants to move on.

 

"I’m sorta seeing someone right now so I can't be messing around with you anymore," Donghyuk can't believe what he's hearing.

 

"I-I, what?" Donghyuk doesn’t want to believe.

 

"I’m seeing someone now," Bobby repeats, slightly annoyed. Donghyuk can feel his heart shattering, breaking into a million little pieces. Bobby's broken his heart more times than he can remember, but he always came back. Bobby was always right there.

 

“Now your deciding to be loyal?” Bobby shrugs. “Who,” he chokes up, tears threatening to spill. “Who is it?” The minute Donghyuk asks he regrets it. Bobby smiles, eyes glimmering in the moonlight.

 

”Kim Hanbin,” He says. His eyes have this faraway look in them as if Bobby was hiding something. At this point, Donghyuk doesn't bother to hide his tears anymore. They spill down his cheeks like rivers, and he wipes them away as quick as they come. It had to be Hanbin. It just had to be. 

 

"Don't cry," Bobby says, trying to touch him. "Don't worry, I don't plan on staying with him long, I get tired _way_ too easily," Bobby smirks, placing a hand on Donghyuk's cheek. He kisses him like there's no tomorrow, soft and gentle, full of want and longing. It does numbers to Donghyuk, sending chills down his pine and butterflies beating at his ribcage. He's been waiting for so long for Bobby to kiss him like that. Like he means it. Like he loves him. Bobby bites his bottom lip and then pulls away. "Maybe I'll come running back to you, who knows."

 

"What makes you think I'll stay and wait for you?" Donghyuk wipes some more tears away.

 

"Because you love me," Bobby kisses him sweetly. "And I think I love you too--"

 

"Bullshit" Donghyuk almost slaps him. He should.

 

"Let me mess up with someone else first, hm?" Donghyuk pulls away, his anger getting the best of him.

 

"Bobby, that doesn’t make any fucking sense and you know it! Being in a relationship with someone you love guarantees there are going to be hardships. That’s how it is. Even if you messed up with me you know damn well I'd still love you and want to be with you. I wouldn't just fucking _stop_ , because then I would've moved on a long time ago. If you loved me you would stay with me. God, you make me sound so pathetic but it's true. If you love someone you stay, don't make it complicated!" Donghyuk yells, more tears coming hot and heavy.

 

”I’m not gonna _feel_ any better if you’re gone. It’s not going to be _better_ if you’re gone. Bobby, I love you so much. So, so much, and for so long. And now you feel the same you want to run? To Hanbin?" Bobby scoffs.

 

”I don’t even care anymore about that. Just I want you. You want me. Don’t make this any more complicated than it has to be," They both go quiet for a long time, nothing but Donghyuk’s occasionally sniffle. Bobby is trying to get his emotions in check. He’s trying hard to not fall for Donghyuk any harder. He messed up a gazillion times, he broke Donghyuks heart so much. He doesn’t deserve to be loved by him like this. Donghyuk tilts his head back, looking at the bright silver moon in the dark sky.

 

“Bobby _please_ don’t make me beg,” Bobby can’t stand to look at Donghyuk anymore. He had seen the boy broken because of him a million times before, but today was different. Bobby _felt_ different. His feet itch to move, to run, yet he stays planted on the ground, unmoving

 

Bobby moves to kiss him again, and Donghyuk puts his hand on his lips. "Stay," He whispers. Bobby looks at him. Really looks at him this time, and he can see how vulnerable Donghyuk is. How much he loves him. So many feelings and emotions Bobby was blind to before. He sees it all, and he wants to look away but he can't. He wants to leave, but he can't. _He_ _can't_.

 

"Stay." Donghyuk says, voice almost gone, broken. "Don't run away," Bobby kisses him hard, full on the lips. He embraces Donghyuk, wrapping his arms around him firm and tight. He doesn't want to let go.

 

  

 

 

 

 

 

 

(correction, he won't let go. He’s not gonna loose Donghyuk anymore, and he’s not going to run away) 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"I'll stay."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[END]

**Author's Note:**

> kinda feel like I poisoned the tag with this fic ngl
> 
> will probably be poisoning the tag cause I have three more fics with this pairing yay me


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